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But while data from recent surveys by SingStat and the National Population and Talent Division NPTD in Singapore shows an increasing acceptance in society towards the use of dating apps, empirical evidence in churches hint at a more reticent view. Jason Mandryk, who is in his 40s, was an early adopter of technology in his search for a partner, having ed dating websites more than 10 years ago.
It was a logical and pragmatic choice, given his circumstances. Mandryk, who has lived in Singapore for several years, is a Christian researcher and the author of Operation World, a publication widely regarded as the definitive volume of prayer Christian dating singapore about the world. Before Singapore, Mandryk was based in a small town just outside of London, studying and collating data on the Christian dating singapore worldwide. Paul Shi, 33, is an Australian Chinese who moved to Singapore four years ago and works as ministry staff in a large local church with a vibrant young adult population.
Paul Shi, a full-time ministry staff, speaking at a young adult event held in his church. Dating apps were an avenue for him to meet Christian women outside of his church. Photo courtesy of Paul Shi. Working in a female-dominated industry and having grown up in her childhood church, Stefanie found herself in a stagnating social circle. Jonathan was a relatively new user, driven more by his curiosity than the intention to meet new people — although he was keen on that as well.
After they were matched on a local dating app, Jonathan and Stefanie talked for almost two weeks before their first date. After several more dates over the next few months, their interest in each other grew into love and respect when they found that they held similar values towards God and life. On their second date, Jonathan invited Stefanie to his secondary school friends when they gathered during Chinese New Year.
Her friend had told her, a good way to evaluate someone was to observe them when they were with friends and family. Photo courtesy of Stefanie Peng. Mandryk agreed with that perspective. He shared that whilst dating a woman he had met online, they introduced one another into their social circles early on.
Online dating is merely another aspect of life that should be lived together in the fellowship of believers. While he never kept it a secret, Mandryk says he did keep a lower profile in the past because online dating, an unfamiliar concept to many, often carried negative connotations. These days, Mandryk goes through this journey with a Christian friend, who is also a user of dating apps. To Mandryk, online dating is merely another aspect of life that should be lived out as part of the community of believers.
The gap varies across countries, he says. Some are marginal, but others are startlingly pronounced. Whereas in Japan, the figures reported range from a to ratio — that means there are between 5 to 10 single females for every single male church-goer! Paul, on the other hand, takes a different approach. To him, dating starts with friendship and a common commitment as a disciple of Christ. He has less expectations of potential dates, but holds himself to a few non-negotiable boundaries.
That is almost one out of every three couples who do not agree with, or live by, the value of a shared faith in God. But Stefanie had values that mattered greatly to her — she knew she wanted a partner who loved God and showed it through his actions. So even as they chatted, she held the connection loosely and watched closely. The day Stefanie decided to quit online dating was the day that she was matched with Jonathan. The couple is now engaged, having dated for just over two years. As it turned out, Jonathan was not only actively serving in church, his ministry was so time-intensive that their lack of weekends together caused Stefanie some frustration.
Even for Paul, an extrovert by nature, constantly meeting and interacting with new dates soon became emotionally-draining. Even if nothing pans out, remember who you are. Christian or otherwise, we get our identity from what God thinks of us — a transforming perspective we can get through Scripture and personal intimacy with Him.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. For better or for worse, the use of dating apps looks like a trend that is here to stay. Whether or Christian dating singapore its use becomes as ubiquitous and accepted as most forms of social media remains to be seen. But as with most of forms of technology that has integrated itself into our daily life, this is probably one that is best experienced in community with God and man, guarded by the peace of God.
She usually has more questions than answers but is always happiest in the water, where she's learning what it means to "be still". Photo by Pratik Gupta on Unsplash. Dating starts with friendship and a common commitment as a disciple of Christ.
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