Dating a developer

Added: Illana Webb - Date: 26.07.2021 12:05 - Views: 20634 - Clicks: 2572

Podcast: Play in new window Download It takes a unique individual to be a software developer. You have to be able to focus on the specific while coding and testing but see the larger picture when deing a solution. It also takes a bit of nerdiness and studiousness as you have to constantly be a student and learning to keep up with the industry.

While shows like Big Bang Theory and Mr. Robot portray nerds as un-athletic asthmatics, software developers come in all forms. Relationships with software developers come with their own challenges. Whether you are a developer dating another developer or coming from a completely different perspective relationships within the software development community face the same things as other relationships. However the way developers react and handle situations may be different.

In addition you can use this to better understand yourself and your own motivations and reactions to the people you interact with on a daily basis. Disclaimer: We are limited to our own experiences and cannot talk to those of groups we are not members. The same goes for many other situations which we do not have experience.

Our goal is to provide value while also having a little fun in this episode. Some of us have our own houses now. However, developers come in all shapes and sizes. Lunch conversations can range from sorority reunions to the newest DLC for whatever game is hot.

This among other things has created a diverse range of personalities in the developer community. Some computer science students attend bootcamps as a way to learn more practical skills after graduating college. Many developers are going to prefer to be in front of their computers than watching TV or doing something else. They will likely spend all night working on something or playing some video game. There are two important spectrums to understanding social interactions with people. Being an Introvert or Extrovert determines whether you get the excitement and energy to do the things that you have to do day to day.

Do you want to go home and be left alone to re-energize for the next day? Do you want to go out with friends to vent frustrations and get yourself pumped? This can also apply to how you respond to having a good day as well. Introverts get refreshed from being alone and time to themselves. Extroverts gain motivation from being around others, especially friends. You can be anywhere on the spectrum from extremely introverted to extremely extroverted and anywhere in the middle.

Most people will land somewhat to one side or the other of the middle. There have been studies as to what jobs are preferred by those on either side of the spectrum. Whether you are Shy or Outgoing expresses how you interact with others when around them. Do you venture out and meet new people and make new friends and acquaintances? Someone further on the shy side of the spectrum will not be comfortable around a lot of new people preferring a few close friends.

A person on the outgoing side enjoys the company of lots of people, some of whom are new and different. You can be anywhere on this spectrum as well. Most people find themselves somewhere toward the middle of extremely shy or extremely outgoing. Combining the two spectrums you get a picture of how a person socializes and what to expect when out in public with them.

Outgoing Introverts enjoy being around other people but need to be alone to refresh and recover. This is especially so if they have been around people for an extended amount of time or have done something stressful like public speaking. Outgoing Extroverts both enjoy Dating a developer around other people and get their energy from crowds. Charismatic performers and speakers can be this way. Shy Introverts do not enjoy being around a lot of other people and feel more comfortable alone that out with people.

This even applies to being out with friends. This can make finding new friends difficult unless current friends introduce them. This person wants to be around others but not just anybody. Spend time getting to know their fandoms.

Whether is be TV shows like Dr. Who, board games, video games, or fantasy role playing take time to learn about your partners interests. By accepting the person you accept their fandoms. Sports is a type of fandom, whether you play or watch. If possible participate with them. This will bring the relationship to a new level. A lot Dating a developer activities can be enjoyed with multiple people. For some people doing things with their partner is the highlight of the activity. Showing interest in something your partner enjoys will also encourage Dating a developer to take interest in things you like.

Encourage them to you in your fandoms. All but the most boring person has something they enjoy doing or some fandom. Encouraging your partner to in on the things that you enjoy doing shows Dating a developer you want them to be in even the geekiest parts of your life. These can be either healthy or unhealthy in a relationship. Whether it is healthy or not may vary between relationships. What is a healthy way to communicate in one instance may not be healthy in another. Learn to understand different styles of communication and work with the differences.

Also be able to identify negative patterns or responses to styles other than your own. You may fall in different places on these spectrums than your partner. The goal is to understand how you communicate and be able to understand the other person as well. These are different from passive, aggressive, assertive styles. A common difference in communication is between the amplifier and the condenser communication styles.

The condenser style only shares as much information as is necessary for communication. The amplifier provides extra detail to increase understanding present a full picture. Amplifiers may be frustrated with condensers for not talking enough about their feelings. Condensers in relationships with amplifiers need to make an effort to express their thoughts and feelings. For the amplifier sharing builds intimacy. Condensers can feel overwhelmed with all the information provided by an amplifier. Amplifiers in relationships with condensers need to practice expressing themselves in a short concise manner.

A way to do this is write down thoughts and then distill out the key points. The next spectrum or difference is the competitive vs affiliate styles. Competitive communicators tend to be more assertive and challenging. They are oriented toward power and dominance. They prefer to make decisions on their own. Affiliate communicators tend to be more collaborative.

Dating a developer

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