How men play hard to get

Added: Ashli Fickes - Date: 05.12.2021 21:51 - Views: 23829 - Clicks: 8681

Posted October 4, Reviewed by Matt Huston. Playing hard-to-get is not just a tactic people used in the past. It is still prevalent, except that it has taken new forms. They do not seem to want to develop the relationship at all but only to keep the other person interested. Before reviewing the paper, let us consider, in more detail, common reasons people play hard-to-get.

Rarity and limited availability often suggest value. But if this is true, why are women seemingly more likely to play hard-to-get than men? One possibility is that women use this strategy for reasons other than increasing their value as mates. For example, a woman may play hard-to-get as a way to test How men play hard to get suitor and learn more about his personality and behavior.

Another possibility is that playing hard-to-get, from an evolutionary perspective, is too costly for men. Men who play hard-to-get lose sexual opportunities and more chances to pass on their genes. Last, cultural and societal norms also influence this behavior—these norms may urge women, not men, to play hard-to-get. The paper by Bowen and Gillath reports the of four studies. The first study was concerned mainly with the relationship between genderplaying hard-to-get, and attachment style.

The second investigation focused on reasons related to the pursuit of those playing How men play hard to get. These reasons were also measured using a new scale; common factor analysis extracted three factors: challenge the enjoyment of the pursuitself-esteem e. To explore the causal influence of attachment styles on playing hard-to-get, the last two investigations included manipulations related to hypothetical dates, as described below.

Specifically, participants were shown attachment primes, being asked to recall and write about a relationship related to either attachment security, anxietyor avoidance:. The security prime concerned the achievement of closeness and minimal fear of abandonment. The anxiety prime involved fear of abandonment and failure to achieve relationship closeness. And the avoidance prime concerned a relationship with major trust problems and with one partner wanting more intimacy than the other. Subsequently, participants were shown pictures of targets attractive faces and imagined a hypothetical date with them.

In one experiment, participants were asked the likelihood of playing hard-to-get if they knew the target was interested in them; in another, they were instead asked the likelihood of engaging in the pursuit if the target was playing hard-to-get.

Analysis of showed women were more willing than men to play hard-to-get. Men, in comparison, were more interested in pursuing someone who played hard-to-get. Avoidant individuals women in particular were more likely to play hard-to-get. They reportedly did so for a variety of reasons: To manipulate, determine compatibility, maintain social standing, and protect themselves from feeling vulnerable. Playing hard-to-get appeared less common in secure people. And those with attachment anxiety, particularly men, were more likely to pursue potential partners who play hard-to-get.

Avoidance primes resulted in an increased likelihood of playing hard-to-get in avoidant men, while anxiety primes increased the probability of pursuing people who play hard-to-get. The data also indicated that playing hard-to-get is not simply about eliciting romantic pursuits. Specifically, playing hard-to-get communicates, indirectly, the type of relationship the individual would like to pursue. And it regulates the risks e. Arash Emamzadeh attended the University of British Columbia in Canada, where he studied genetics and psychology. He has also done graduate work in clinical psychology and neuropsychology in U.

Arash Emamzadeh Finding a New Home. Playing hard to get and attachment styles are investigated in a new study. Attachment Essential Re. About the Author. Online: Fearless PsychologyTwitter. Read Next. Back Psychology Today. Back Find a Therapist. Back Get Help. Personality Passive Aggression Personality Shyness. Family Life Child Development Parenting. View Help Index. Do I Need Help? Back Magazine.

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How men play hard to get

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The science behind why so many people play hard-to-get while dating